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Beyond the Drama/Trauma Playground of Life

by Rebecca Skeele, MA, MSS, LPCC

Posted Friday, 11 April 2008

Did you play on a see-saw as a child?

Growing up, my little brother and I spent hours pushing each other up and down on this playground apparatus. And our game went like this…

We would take turns holding each other up in the air while one of us weighted the board down in the dirt - until that got boring; or we would see if we could hold the see-saw still and balance each other- until that got boring; or we would just see-saw up and down – until that got boring.

It never failed – the see-saw, like the swings and the merry-go-round in our neighborhood park, got boring pretty quickly.  No matter how ‘differently’ we tried to get it to behave, or how creative we were with our imagination, the see-saw just went up and down. It was true to its nature. It performed exactly like it was designed to perform.

We have a part of us that operates much the same way as that see-saw. It’s called the ‘human nature’ and its job is to maintain the status quo – the existing state of affairs. This is all fine and dandy until one day we wake up and decide that the habitual ‘state of affairs’ is boring and limiting. AND because we forgot when and how we originally created our status quo (those choices went unconscious years ago) we are lost as to how to create something new and different in our lives.

Examples of the status quo

If, in the area of your life called finances, you are conditioned through limiting beliefs

for your cash flow to see-saw up and down -  that’s what your cash flow will do. One month/year you will have surplus and the next month/year you will not have enough.

Or in relationships, if habitual emotional responses have you always going in circles –

then your relationships will feel like a merry-go-round. Each time you enter into a new relationship you will vow not to repeat the same ‘mistakes’ of the past, but before long the challenges feel too familiar.

Or what about swinging back and forth from too much worrying, stress, ‘what ifs’

to negative self-talk of too much or not enough? This drama/trauma takes the peace and joy out of every day life because you are always waiting for the other ‘shoe to drop.’

Feel familiar?

I refer to this constant drama/trauma playground behavior as the ‘status quo’.

Who decides what the ‘status quo’ is in our lives?

WE DO, at a pretty young age. We decide, based on our experiences as a child, what is right and what is wrong. We choose our beliefs, our perceptions, and our values and then uphold those choices with our thoughts and feelings. We create a world view in which all is controllable, knowable and makes sense to our human nature. And even more important, these habitual emotions, thoughts, beliefs, conditioning and perceptions keep us feeling safe and secure.

But what if I no longer want to have feast or famine in my finances; or the same old relationship issues? What if I want more peace, joy, happiness and success in my life?

Can I change the status quo?

The short answer is ‘yes’. The longer answer is a process of uncovering and discovering the beliefs that are fueling your perceptions, learn new skills of self-mastery to access an expanded playing field and choose to play a different game.

Think about the default setting on your computer. Until you consciously change the settings that came with your computer you get what the manufacturer set.

Our consciousness works similarly. Unless you consciously set another default setting for what you want/desire – like an expansive dream, wealth, health and happiness;

or a new approach in relationships with spouse/family/friends- and then do what it takes to rewire, realign and redirect the levels that are involved -  you will not operate beyond the default playground of your life. In other words, the default agenda of your human nature will continually override any positive affirmation to change, desire to change, or attempt to change.

Sound hopeless?

Well, it’s not. Because you are much more than your human reactive nature.

Beyond the drama/trauma playground lies a greater reality. I call it the cocreation playing field. The status quo here is growth, expansion and revelation.

There are no rides that make you dizzy from self-sabotaging behavior ad nausea.

Soul – your divinity is in charge of this playing field and every moment can potentially be full of fresh, new awareness.

To access this new playing field of being, seeing, acting and thinking I have given the process a name: becoming a spiritual scientist.

A spiritual scientist: one who observes through the eyes of the soul how to work masterfully with the human reactive nature, apply the learning to their life and cocreate heaven on earth.

But is it fun? Or is it hard work?

Depends on how you approach the process. If you see every new choice as moving you from struggle, guilt, stress, fear and disappointment into peace, joy, expansion, fulfillment and loving, the part of you that was ‘playing it safe’ now experiences a new reference point for security and safety. Excitement replaces trepidation and grace is present in every step.

The metamorphosis process of the caterpillar into a butterfly has a very interesting stage. In its chrysalis stage the ‘imaginary cells’ of the butterfly template are already present. But the chrysalis, thinking that the imaginary cells are foreign tries to destroy the cells. However, because these cells are what the chrysalis must become, the process is not sabotaged. The power within those imaginary cells are greater than the knee jerk reaction to destroy them.

You have within you the ‘blue print cells’ of another way to live life…and the power of your divine self that can not be sabotaged. Every time, through practice, you move beyond judgment, shame or blame and open to compassion, acceptance and forgiveness the power within grows stronger. Then, magically, when the process is complete, what has always been present, but hidden within, emerges. You then become who you truly are: radiant, whole, healed, empowered and alive with joy!

Rebecca Skeele, MA, MSS, LPCC, is the author of You Can Make It Heaven: How to Enrich Your Life with Abundance and Loving. In private practice since 1990, she combines her extensive years as a spiritual counselor and coach, energy therapy balancing, and her study as a non-denominational minister to support conscious choice and awakening to the truth within. Her professional soul-focused course, Becoming a Spiritual Scientist: A Course for CoCreators is offered in Santa Fe, NM. www.makeitheaven.com www.spiritual-scientist.com 505 984-1739 rebecca@makeitheaven.com

by Rebecca Skeele, MA, MSS, LPCC

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